What the Bible Says About Being a Good Mom: 9 Qualities You Need

Are you looking for guidance on how to be a good mother? Look no further than the Bible. This post outlines nine qualities of a good mother we should all strive to embody.

At least once a week (and sometimes much more often) I am plagued by the question, “Am I a good mom? Am I doing enough (but not too much) to raise my boys to love Jesus and live for Him? Could I have handled that situation differently?”

Down deep in the heart of any mother is just one simple desire: to be a good mom. Questioning our abilities and motives often keeps us awake at night–minds spinning with worry.

Social media gives us access to the hidden parts of people’s lives that past generations weren’t able to see. And it often leaves us feeling let-down, and like we’ll never measure up. 

In fact, we aren’t meant to measure up to anyone else. Being a good mother is so much more than what we see portrayed on Pinterest or a perfectly-composed Instagram reel.

To know the qualities of a good mother according to the Bible, we need to dig deep into Scripture and see what God has to say. There is no such thing as a perfect mother, no matter what you see portrayed on the tiny Instagram squares. 

What is the Biblical Role of a Mother?

The role of a mother is often very different from what the world tells us. Characteristics of a good mother have nothing to do with a beautifully curated home, cute craft projects, or healthy, organic meals. Being a good Christian mother is more about building a solid foundation of faith where our children can build their lives on the Lord.

While it’s not a popular opinion in today’s society, Titus 2 tells us that God has given the role of raising children and taking care of the home to women. 

The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.
Titus 2:3-5

God has given older women the task of teaching and encouraging younger women the characteristics of a godly woman. These mature, godly mothers should emulate a faithful life, and younger Christian moms should follow their example. 

Related: 9 Inspiring Ways Modern Woman Can Be Like the Titus 2 Woman

9 Qualities of a Good Mother According to the Bible 

God’s Word gives us all the instructions we need for being a good mom. When we follow God’s plan for motherhood, we will be the kind of mothers our children need. Not perfect–but faithful women of God who depend on God’s grace to face the challenges of raising children. 

God calls a mother to pour into the lives of her children, but first, she must fill her own cup with God’s love and mercy. A godly mother must demonstrate the fruit of the spirit to her own children and encourage them to follow God’s plan for their lives.  

But godliness with contentment is great gain.
1 Timothy 6:6

​Our modern society tells us that children are a burden. But God says they are a gift to be treasured. 

Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.
Psalm 127:3

Raising our children requires the grace of God and the power of the Holy Spirit. But God has given us a special mother’s love, and when we follow our Heavenly Father’s instruction, we can be successful mothers in the eyes of God. 

​A godly mother is faithful. 

Being a mother is the most wonderful privilege you’ll ever have. But there’s no denying that sometimes it’s hard. 

A godly mother doesn’t quit in the hard times. She gets up every day and keeps going. She does her best to honor her husband and create a happy home. 

A faithful mother prays for her children, even when it seems like it’s not working. She takes them to church, teaches them to sit still, and often spends more time in the nursery than she does in the service.

As moms, we know that our work here on earth is for eternity. Everything we do with our kids takes time. But if we keep up the work, keep teaching and training, and cleaning up all the spilled milk…we’ll reap the rewards one day. 

And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap if we faint not.
Galatians 6:9

A good mother extends God’s grace.

I am not perfect. And I know that no matter what your Instagram portrays, you aren’t either. But isn’t it amazing that God loves us anyway?

Through His strength, we can extend the same grace to our kids that God gives to us. And as moms, we are given at least a hundred opportunities every day to show grace. 

Sometimes there is pain when we disobey our Heavenly Father, and sometimes our kids have to face consequences for disobedience, also.

But there is always the grace to try again. To clean up the mess and sit down together. To make a plan that we will not make this mistake again. 

We will fail again. Our kids will fail again. But a graceful mother knows that she can use these opportunities to help her children grow and learn.

Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.
Colossians 4:6

A godly mother disciplines in love. 

Discipline is not the same thing as punishment. The word “discipline” means “to train someone to obey rules or a code of behavior.” 

Discipline is the training that has to come before any type of punishment. 

Young children come into this world knowing absolutely nothing. We have to teach them to do everything from talking to walking, using the potty, and eating macaroni and cheese with a fork instead of their fingers. 

But we also have to train our children in fear of the Lord and teach them the things of God so that they can be wise and follow God’s way. 

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding.
Proverbs 9:10

The training is constant. And sometimes it’s incredibly frustrating. It feels like they will never learn. 

When you’re in the middle of a messy day-to-day mess, it’s easy to miss the eternal work happening. 

But God is working–in you and in your children, and He will complete the job.

Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ.
Philippians 1:6

A good mother trusts God’s plan.

If it was up to me, my kids would never experience pain of any kind. A friend would never hurt their feelings, they’d never fail a test, or trip walking up steps and bruise a shin. 

But pain is how we grow. 

Did you know that the process of metamorphosis for a butterfly is extremely painful? It struggles and fights to remove the chrysalis that’s formed around it. 

If you’re watching, you’re tempted to reach in and pull the butterfly free. But it’s the struggle that strengthens the butterfly’s wings. If you “rescue” it from the pain, it won’t be able to fly. It will die.

In the same way, if we swoop in and rescue our kids from any pain or discomfort, they’ll never grow into the people God wants them to be. 

We have to trust that God’s plan for our children is better than our own. Even if that means that they sometimes have to experience hard things.

For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your way, and my thoughts than your thoughts.
Isaiah 55:9

A godly mom spends her time wisely.

There are whole books written about the Proverbs 31 woman, and everyone has a slightly different opinion about what she does. 

But one thing we can all learn is that she doesn’t waste time. She makes the most of every moment, from dawn until long past dark, meeting her family’s needs.

But it does mean a good mom uses every minute the best she can. Our time in this life is incredibly short. Only the things we do for Christ will last for eternity. 

That’s not saying we don’t ever have to do things like clean the house or pay the bills. (Bummer, right?)

However, we should live each day with a greater purpose than ourselves. Time spent foolishly (scrolling Facebook, anyone?) can’t be recovered.

A faithful mother will work to spend her time wisely, focusing on the eternal things that matter most.

She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
Proverbs 31:27

A good mother leads by example.

Last week I heard my son speak to his brother in a tone that I did not like. But then, I realized (to my shame) I’d used that tone to speak to them before. 

Kids do what we do much more often than they do what we say. And that’s a tough pill to swallow. 

As a stay-at-home mom, I spend more time with my kids than anyone else does. My actions will influence them more than probably anyone else in their lives. When I exhibit bad behavior, they will too. 

A Biblical mother sets a good example for her children to follow. She is willing to live her faith in front of them and encourage them to have their own faith as well. 

…Be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.
1 Timothy 4:12

A great mom plans for the future.

The children you and I have in our homes will one day be adults. It’s hard to think of that when we’re changing diapers, cleaning spilled juice, or teaching basic math skills. 

But one day they will be grown-ups, making their own decisions, and living a life apart from their mamas in an ungodly world. What kind of adult do you want your child to be?

This is more than the career you hope they choose. What characteristics do you want them to have? Now is the time to start developing those qualities. 

Teach them kindness, generosity, and hard work. Show them what it means to serve God, and give them opportunities to serve as well.

Planning for the future is not the same as worrying, or trying to control your kids. It’s being determined to put in the work that comes with leading by example and disciplining in love. Teach your little children that God’s work in their lives is more important than their own plans, and teach them to trust Him. 

There are many devices in a man’s heart; nevertheless the counsel of the Lord, that shall stand.
Proverbs 19:21

A godly mother submits to her husband. 

As the mother of sons, I pray often that they will find wives who love and respect them. As part of that prayer, I need to be a role model in front of them so that they will know what a good wife is. 

​I want my marriage and home to exhibit a strong family life that my children will one day want to copy in their own homes. Proverbs 14:1 tells us that a wise woman will build her house, but the foolish plucks it down with her hands. 

As mothers, we have the crucial role of demonstrating a Christian family to our kids. While we sometimes balk at the idea of submitting to our husbands, that is God’s plan and He will bless a believing mother who obeys Him. 

The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
Proverbs 31:11-12

A godly mom spends time in prayer. 

There is no better influence in a child’s life than a praying mother. When you’re mothering younger kids, finding time to pray can seem almost impossible. 

In her book Praying Mom, Brooke McGlothlin says:

If you’re a mom of young children whose brain feels like mush most days, and who goes to bed each night wondering if you can possibly have the strength to get up the next day and do it all over again, you need to be praying. 

Sometimes that looks like praying in the car, while you’re taking a shower or the little pockets of time you have between the crises that come with motherhood. 

How, when, and where matters a lot less than taking your needs to your Heavenly Father often. God sees a mother’s heart and hears her prayers. 

For this child I prayed; and the Lord hath given me my petition which I asked of him:
1 Samuel 1:27

The Best Way to Be a Better Mom

There are a lot of voices out there telling you how to be a good mom. And sometimes it seems like we’ll never get there. 

Thankfully, only one source really matters. The good news is that if we really want to know the important qualities of a Christian mother, God has promised to give you His wisdom. 

If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.
James 1:5

God gives mothers a discerning heart when it comes to raising their children. And we have a great influence over their lives. Apostle Paul tells Timothy that he can see the influence of his mother, Eunice, and his grandmother, Lois in Timothy’s life. Those two women were instrumental in giving Timothy a good understanding of the Holy Scriptures and the ways of God.

If you want to be a better mom, all you have to do is ask. God’s Word is full of Bible verses that show us how to have the qualities of a good mother and raise our children to know and love God. Raising children God’s way has its own reward that we all hope to receive someday!

Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.
Proverbs 31:28

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