13 Inspirational Characteristics of a Godly Wife for Modern Christian Women
Being a Christian wife in the modern world is a struggle! You long to honor God and obey the Bible, but a submissive woman is not popular in today’s society. Let these 13 Bible characteristics of a godly wife encourage you to follow God’s will even when it goes against modern sensibilities.
Some Bible verses are more popular than others. We like to read all about love, blessings, and happiness. The ones about killing, stealing, and taking the name of the Lord God in vain don’t bother us much. They’re easy.
But then we get to the ones that tell us how we should honor and obey our husbands. Those are a little bit harder to follow.
However, even hard Bible verses are put there for a reason. God does have blessings and joy in store for us, but only when we live according to His plan.
How to Be a Good Wife
Being a loving, honoring wife is not always easy. Those mushy-gushy feelings that overflow on our wedding day don’t last forever.
But love is a choice. It requires waking up every day and choosing to love this person. Love is a commitment we make to stay faithful even when the feelings are gone.
As Christian women, we can turn to God’s Word for instructions on how to be good wives and have a Biblical marriage. The Bible gives us instructions for following God and our husbands.
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13 Characteristics of a Godly Woman in the Bible
If you’re not sure where to start to be a godly wife, you can find encouragement in God’s Word.
Here are 13 Biblical characteristics and Bible verses to help you be a good, godly wife in a modern world.
A Godly Wife Loves–Even When It’s Hard
And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins. – 1 Peter 4:8
Love is often interpreted as a fuzzy feeling. But it’s far more than that. Feelings are temporary, and they can be fickle.
If we depend on the feelings, we’ll give up on marriage pretty quickly. True love requires sacrifice and hard work.
It means waking up every day and making the decision to keep loving, even when we don’t feel like it. And sometimes you really, really don’t feel like it.
Sometimes, love means turning a blind eye to imperfections and flaws. It’s not noticing when his hair turns gray or his waistline gets a little thicker. (Remember, yours probably is, too!)
Love requires us to pick up the dirty socks one more time without making a comment. Being a loving wife isn’t always easy, but it has multiple rewards!
A Godly Wife is Respectful–Honoring Her Husband’s Needs
Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband. – Ephesians 5:33
In her book For Women Only, Shaunti Feldhahn writes that while women crave love from their husbands, men crave respect from their wives.
Men and women are designed differently, not only physically but also emotionally and mentally.
As women, we like to hear words. But men like to see actions. No matter how much you tell him you love him, he probably won’t believe it if your actions don’t show it.
Your man needs to know that you trust him and believe in him. He needs you to build him up and let him know how much he matters. Let your kids see that you love and respect their dad by honoring your husband.
A Godly Wife is Supportive–Even if She Doesn’t Agree
Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. – Ecclesiastes 4:9
Does being a good wife mean you agree with your husband all the time?
Nope.
No two people ever see eye-to-eye on everything. But being a good wife means we support our husbands even if we don’t agree.
The truth is that God made a husband to be the leader of the home. He gets the honor of making the decisions. But he ultimately has to answer for the decisions he makes.
As a wife, you aren’t a doormat. You can voice your thoughts and express your opinion. A good man will listen to his wife’s ideas.
But in the end, the decision is his. And he needs his wife to support him.
When two people work together, the work is easier. Your husband has big shoulders and he can carry a heavy burden.
But it’s so much easier for him to carry it if you’re shouldering it with him.
A Godly Wife is Prayerful–Trusting God No Matter What
Pray without ceasing. – 1 Thessalonians 5:17
The most important thing a wife can do for her husband is to pray for him. Prayer is not just tossing requests out into the universe.
Prayer is talking to an almighty God Who controls the universe. Everything is in His hands.
When it comes to my husband and family, my tendency is to worry. I like to be in control and get nervous when I’m not.
But God wants me to trust Him instead. He knows what’s best for my husband, far better than I do!
A godly wife gives her burdens to God and lets Him handle them.
Is this easy? Not at all. But we can only have a peaceful life when we prayerfully trust the Lord.
A Godly Wife is Trustworthy–Protecting Her Marriage at All Costs
The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. – Proverbs 31:11
Marriage vows mean very little in our modern world. When marriage gets hard, it sometimes feels easier to walk away.
God created the family unit, and it is something truly beautiful. Satan hates families and will do whatever he can to destroy them.
Marriage problems often start pretty small. A little disagreement that one person can’t let go. Arguments over money, bills, and debt. A husband who spends too little time at home, and a wife who feels like she spends too much time at home!
Any time our enemy sees a little crack in a marriage, he will do whatever he can to break it open.
A Christian wife will do whatever she can to protect her marriage. She realizes that society and Satan are against her, so she’s aware of all of her choices.
It’s important to protect your integrity. Don’t keep secrets from your husband. Strive to never be alone with another man. Don’t engage in private conversations that can create feelings between you and someone else.
I know these principles aren’t popular in our world today. But a wife of godly character is willing to step outside the norm and do whatever it takes to protect her marriage.
A Godly Wife is Hardworking–Knowing God Sees and Values Her Efforts
She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. – Proverbs 31:27
Being a wife and mom can often seem like a thankless job. Most of what we do is hidden in our homes. Everyone likes clean clothes, but they rarely thank the person who washes them!
Even though it’s mostly invisible, the work you do is important. When no one else see what you do, God does.
In God’s eyes, no calling is more important than another. He calls some people to perform visible ministries. They preach or sing, teach or lead.
He calls others to tasks that don’t gain a lot of attention. These jobs are at least as important as the visible ones–maybe even more so.
If God called you to be a wife and mother, that calling matters. It’s not an accident that you are exactly where you are.
Don’t fall for Satan’s lie that serving your husband and family isn’t an important calling. Yes, it takes hard work. But when you’re living out God’s plan, it’s worth all the sacrifices you make.
A Godly Wife is Forgiving–Not Holding Grudges
And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you. – Ephesians 4:32
Have you ever wondered what life would be like if God only forgave you as much as you forgive others? The truth is, we don’t deserve God’s forgiveness. But He gives it to us willingly.
Even though we have received forgiveness, it’s sometimes hard to give it. God forgave us for Christ’s sake. We can forgive our husbands for the same reason.
Men and women see offenses in different ways. Sometimes, our husbands hurt our feelings without meaning to. Unfortunately, they sin against us in big and little ways.
Forgiveness can be hard. Especially when he doesn’t see what he’s done wrong or doesn’t apologize.
In fact, he may not always deserve our forgiveness. Holding a grudge comes easily–storing up wrongs to hold against him later.
Wouldn’t we be in sad shape if God held us to the same standard? Thankfully, He doesn’t! We can forgive because He forgives.
A Godly Wife is Joyful–Even When She’s Not Happy
The joy of the Lord is your strength. – Nehemiah 8:10
Can you have joy even when you aren’t happy? Absolutely.
Happiness is temporary. It comes from what is happening right now.
Joy comes from the Lord. It is this deep-seated joy that carries us through the hard times.
We get joy from spending time with God each day, reading His Word, and praying. It’s vital for women to build a relationship with the Lord. Learn to see Him and hear Him every day.
We look for joy in a lot of things, people, and places. But it’s all temporary.
True joy is found in a relationship with Jesus Christ, and it lasts forever, even in the darkest days of life.
A Godly Wife is Encouraging–Building Up Her Her Husband
Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do. – 1 Thessalonians 5:11
Husbands are strong and usually silent. They often carry heavy burdens that they won’t even tell us about.
The world beats up on them every day. Your husband needs a place he can come to and feel safe and loved.
Days at home or with kids are hard. Sometimes when your hubby walks in the door, you just want to unleash it all on him.
But he doesn’t need more piled on him. He needs someone to build him up and encourage him.
There’s a time to talk about your struggles with your husband. But there’s also a time to offer him a safe place to rest and relax.
He may never tell you about the hardships he faces. But he should always know that you’re behind him, cheering him on.
A Godly Wife is Wise–Turning to God for Guidance
Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands. – Proverbs 14:1
Too often, we want to take everything into our own hands. It’s hard to let go and let God do what He does best. Which is everything.
But when we try to do things on our own, we mess them up every time. Learning wisdom means turning our lives over to God and letting Him lead.
As Christians, we know in our hearts that God has our best in mind. He’s always working for your good. He has proven Himself trustworthy in all things and you can follow Him.
Matthew 7 tells the parable of a man who built his house on a rock. When the rains came, his house stood firm because it had a solid foundation.
A wise woman builds her life and family on the solid foundation of God’s Word. She trusts Him to lead her life as she follows His plan.
Related: What is a Proverbs 31 Woman? 5 Valuable Qualities Modern Women Need
A Godly Wife is Kind–Showing Grace to All
She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. – Proverbs 31:26
Oh, how much trouble our mouths cause! As we develop godly character and grow our faith, we learn to speak with kindness and wisdom.
A wise woman knows what to say and how to say it. Sometimes, we think we have all the answers.
We snap and say things we regret later. Being kind is hard–especially if you’re like me and have a sarcastic attitude!
But a woman who honors God learns to speak with kindness. Learning it can be hard. It takes intentional effort and learning to control your tongue.
Speaking kindly sets us apart in a world that’s often cruel and hateful.
The truth is, it’s sometimes easier to speak kindly to strangers than to those at home. But our husbands need to hear kind words.
Instead of unloading all of your negativity on him, try speaking kindly. What does it really mean? Just plain old being nice!
A Godly Wife is Submissive–Even if It’s Not Popular
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. – Ephesians 5:22
Being a submissive wife runs against everything within us. We’re like toddlers screaming, “You can’t tell me what to do!”
But the Bible tells us that strong marriages are built on love and submission. Being submissive doesn’t mean you’re not allowed to have opinions.
It does mean that you remember that your husband is the head of the home. As such, he bears the responsibility for the decisions he makes.
Modern women have been taught this is a negative thing and goes against their rights. But the truth is, as the head of his home, a man must answer to God for his decisions.
I certainly don’t want to try to take the lead and have to answer to God for my mistakes! I’d rather submit to my husband and let God lead him.
Of course, my husband and I talk about major decisions. I make my opinions known! But in the end, it’s my job to submit to him.
I do this prayerfully, asking God to give him wisdom to make the right decisions. That’s what is best for all involved.
A Godly Wife is Humble–Serving Her Husband with Grace
With all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love; Ephesians 4:2
When my husband proposed, and I said “yes,” I never saw myself as a servant. But that’s exactly what a wife is.
Servants are rarely seen and are generally thought of as lowly. But Jesus turned that idea on its head when He said that the greatest in the kingdom is the servant of all.
When we serve our husbands humbly and with grace, we are following in the Savior’s footsteps. Only hours before His death, he knelt down and washed His disciples’ feet.
Jesus knew what He was facing in the upcoming night and the next day. His response was not to sit back and wait for someone to serve Him. Instead, He took care of others.
Women are naturally made to nurture and take care of others. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy.
How can we follow Jesus’ example and serve when it’s hard? Through love. Love compels us to take care of our husbands from a heart that’s filled with grace.
A Godly Wife is Faithful–Living According to God’s Truth
Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path. – Psalm 119:105
Above all, a godly wife remains steadfast in her faith. She consistently reads God’s Word, applies it to her life, and lives according to His truth.
She is a light in her home, pointing her family toward God in every way. She’s consistent, displaying God’s love through her character and attitude.
The Bible tells us that being a faithful wife is important. In fact, Paul tells us that a wife who lives faithfully before her husband can win him to the Lord.
Take the characteristics and Bible verses listed here. Read and study them to learn how to become a woman of strong faith. Follow God’s truth and live in His will.
Build your life on a foundation of faith. You can add encouragement, kindness, love, and prayer to this foundation. As you do, your life will develop the characteristics of a godly wife who loves God and your family.
How Can I Be a Good, Godly Wife?
Truth bomb: we cannot be good wives with godly character on our own. It’s impossible for any of us to live a godly life.
That’s where the Holy Spirit comes in. He gives us the strength and ability to follow His guidelines for living a God-honoring life.
If you’re struggling to honor your husband, speak kindly, and offer encouragement, it’s time to go to your knees.
Pray daily for your husband and marriage. Seek God’s help and ask Him to guide you in your efforts to have the characteristics of a godly wife.
Read the Bible and books that encourage you and help you build a strong marriage and home.
Include God in your marriage and invite Him into any battles or struggles you may have. He alone can give you what you need. And He’s ready and willing to give it!
Each of these characteristics comes from a heart that desires to serve God and others. Though none of us are perfect, we can strive to reflect these qualities in our daily lives.
As you continue on your journey as a wife, remember that God’s grace covers you. You don’t have to be perfect—just faithful and willing to let Him shape you into the godly woman He’s called you to be.
More Marriage Encouragement
Looking for more encouragement in your marriage? Check out these 13 Powerful War Room Prayers for Your Husband and Marriage to learn how to pray for your husband.
